Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Update: Spouse Abuse, the Sequel

The threat of violence in my wife's workplace seems to have meandered leisurely from Defcon "BOINGINGING" to Defcon "Ho hum." Apparently the abuser and the coworker are back together again. At least, that's the rumor. Incredibly, and in spite of their mutual legal restraints against each other, the two have reconciled and he has even purchased a ring for her. So, the abuser is currently far too busy being romantic to sneak into my wife's office and massacre everyone there.

Hah ha ha... yeah. It's not funny, is it?

I guess I always saw abuse as an issue between two people, sometimes more if there are children involved, but its a bigger issue than that.

I have lost a lot of respect for my wife's coworker. She's a smart woman and knows, somewhere inside of her, that unless this guy takes serious steps, he's going to hit her again. She knows this because it's happened before... with the same guy. So, what does she plan to do then? Does she vow to leave him again? Does she find a new apartment again? Does she stand before a judge and explain that the restraining order is really necessary... this time... again? Do we get more weeks of vague, but serious threats about the safety of the people in my wife's office?

Like I said, I've lost a lot of respect for my wife's coworker. The heart may want what the heart wants, but the brain knows better than to step in front of a speeding bus. As much as I hate to admit it, in addition to my lack of respect for her, I've also learned to despise the coworker. It's one thing to be stupid. It's another thing to endanger the people around you, because of your poor judgement.

If you're being abused, and according to statistics, some of you are... then get help. If you can't do it for yourself, do it for the people around you and their families.

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